Music and sex men.

ONE:
Like I've said, I'm in a continuous search for new music. I'm never satisfied. I feel like I'm in a rut right now. I need something new, something old, something obscure, something something something that will just blow my brains across the room. Share some music with me, o friends. Give me something, anything, and in return, I will share these five with you. Here's hoping you'll find something that moves you.

1. Alex Rossi - Fast Hennepin
I toiled over this for a few reasons. Do I share at all, and instead beg and plead with you to somehow find a copy of this album to buy? Drive to Minneapolis on the last Wednesday of the month to a certain bar to pay a $5 cover and then $10 for the album solely to support the genius of Rossi? Sounds ridiculous, I know, but really, it's almost worth it. (I say "almost" because if you live in Duluth that would turn out to be like $55 for a cd, including the gas money.) I don't know where else you can buy it. I should look into it. I digress. The other toiling point was which, oh which track from this KILLER album do I share? What gem do I choose? In the end, I chose the title track and the one that put me on the edge of my seat for about two months, waiting for the album to drop. PLEASE listen to this song. You won't be able to stop. (I'm looking at you, Pelowski.)

2. Mason Jennings - The Mountain
I loved Mason back in the early days of my Duluth career but I burned out on him. Completely burned myself out. I rediscovered him last month and can't stop listening to him. Every song was like new, and yet there was a distinct, intense memory linked to each and every one. This one involves the sun coming through vertical blinds and bouncing off the top of a freshly balded head. Music's a powerful thing.

3. John Frusciante - Fallout
I was going to say that I'm not a huge fan of the first 43 seconds of the song, but it sets the mood for the rest of the song. It's part of the experience. If you don't like it, you don't like it, but as I said to a friend the other day, I'm bumping this song like it's going out of style. This is from the era when he started to experiment with synth and electronica and he was on a lot of heroin. It's one hell of a byproduct.

4. The Juliana Theory - Duane Joseph
I know Tony feels me on this. This was my Favorite Band Ever in high school. It was one of those things where I swear to god they were the only people in the whole world who understood me. When I emerged from the emo-tastic darkness, I packed everything away. Well, when I pulled this album back out for a trip down memory lane, I couldn't stop listening to it, and I realized that it's actually really quite good. Sure, it's filled from beginning to end with ridiculous memories of high school, but I think I might actually choose to listen to it if I didn't discover it betwixt adolescent debauchery and feelings of being misunderstood. Maybe I'm wrong.

5. Warrant - Cherry Pie
There needs to be some motherfuckin' butt rock on this list. I will never, ever, ever, ever be ashamed that I have an enduring love for butt rock. Pat tries to make me feel ashamed about it, but I just can't be. Also, this can represent the fact that Guitar Hero II has now entered our apartment and is currently sucking our lives away. (Well, more mine and Pat's than anyone else's... although he did catch Damon playing it at 2am this morning.) Fun fact: did you know that the guitar solo is performed by C. C. DeVille (of Poison fame), my favorite butt-rock guitar god?? I was stoked when I found that out. C. C. DeVille is fucking AWESOME. I'm so fucking pumped up after talking about this. God.

(I realize I have not yet posted my review of the mix you made me, Tony, because I suck -- the very next post is yours.)

And, that brings us to TWO:
It's been quite awhile since I've gushed over the many many men that I'm in love with. It's constantly changing, so I thought I'd update you on who I love right now.

1. Jim Carrey

I've suddenly fallen in love with Jim Carrey. He's always been totally awesome and kind of good-looking, but thanks to some subliminal help, I've come to realize that he's totally awesome and really good-looking. Damn that Jenny McCarthy. I can fart in public too. Pick me instead!

2. Hank Azaria

Ridiculously smart? Check. Ridiculously funny? Check. Ridiculously attractive? Check. In not one, but two of my favorite movies of all time? Oh Hank. I never thought I'd be so attracted to a man who's most notably known for being a voice actor and a drag queen.

3. Mikhail Baryshnikov

Please, Mikhail. Dance. Dance for me. Just like one time. Kinda fell in love with him circa-Sex and the City, like everyone else, but he's been popping up all over my interweb haunts recently and, man, is it hot in here? He is sixty years old. SIXTY YEARS OLD. Aside from Alan Rickman, he's the oldest man I've ever had a crush on. That should creep me out way more than it does.


Five songs and three men later, I close this post with nothing but love. Also, if you're reading this, I probably miss you a lot.