as requested by the most persistent and persuasive girl i know, i'm going to talk about my issues with tracy chapman.

lots of people have bizarre reactions to random things. for example, i have a friend who can't see morgan freeman in anything without tearing up (even movies like "bruce almighty" and "nurse betty") because of her emotional attachment to "the shawshank redemption." (seriously, she instantaneously dissolves into tears every single time she even hears his voice. it's weird.)

similarly, i have an immediate physical reaction to tracy chapman, although it is not tears. whenever i hear her voice.... i have to pee. i'm serious. absolutely serious.

it wasn't always this way. when i first made the connection between ms. chapman and the familiar bladder pressure, i was quite confused because i remembered being able to listen to her in the past and not have this issue.

after nearly infinite hours of soul searching (and trial-and-error with various tracy chapman songs, resulting in countless trips to the bathroom and an embarrassing amount of toilet paper), i finally pinpointed it.

during my senior year of high school, i didn't ride the bus because it came a full seventy-five minutes before school even started, so i convinced my father and/or cousin to drive me to school. we would listen to 97.1 (cities 97) because it was the only radio station that we could agree on. if you're not from the twin cities or the surrounding area, cities 97 is categorized as "adult alternative," so the music played is things like the counting crows, van morrison, u2, coldplay, and, of course, tracy chapman. however, their variety isn't as good as promised; we heard the same four songs on the ride to school every day: "now that i know" by shannon mcnally, "moment of forgiveness" by the indigo girls, "silver lining" by bonnie raitt, and "you're the one" by tracy chapman (in that order).

well, by the time we got to school, i had to go to the bathroom pretty badly. i would jump out of the car, race to the bathroom, head to my locker (which was in the basement, cruelly enough), and be late for physics class. every day. every single day.

so now, whenever i hear tracy chapman, i feel the familiar twinge in my bladder. i've been slowly & surely getting better, but it's still not as it should be.

any bizarre pavlovian responses out there?



i have to pee now, but i think it's unrelated.