i kind of want to put in my two cents about r. kelly's "trapped in the closet" opera, but i think everything that needs to be said has already been said. it is, as mr. gorillamask says, the most ridiculous shit ever. well, the brilliant and underrated jimmy kimmel has done his own version of "trapped in the closet" called "the pizza." and you should watch it.

also, can someone fill me in on what's going on with cameron diaz and this topless photo trial? i really have had no desire to find out about it, but it made top cnn.com news this morning, so i figure i should probably know something about it. i'm counting on you, samantha scott or kim garvey, my pop culture equals. if there is no knowledge of it between the three of us, i'll assume it's not worth knowing.

in other news, who told julia roberts that she should perform on broadway? anyone else remember her singing talents in "pretty woman"? seriously, julia, don't do it. it's a bad idea.

i'm not going to lie -- i want to see hustle & flow. but more than that, i'm ashamed to say that i'm looking forward to the dukes of hazzard. now, i know i've been openly bashing it, but remember when i was talking about my rotating crushes? well, this here's my newest one:



i have a raging crush on him all of a sudden. it's so intense that i will pay a matinee price to see his awful upcoming movie, and i won't regret doing it. i don't really want to see jessica simpson in her underwear, waving her newly perfect ass in my face and making me wish i didn't just buy those gummi worms for the movie, but it's just the price i'll have to pay to see the dreamy johnny knoxville twenty feet tall. i'm not above my shallow mentality, and i'll be the first to admit it.

and finally, i think i saw meryl streep in the cities on tuesday. my brother is going to a jazz camp at smith-mcnally, right across from the fitzgerald theater where they are currently shooting the movie version of "prarie home companion," starring ms. streep. i could be wrong, but i'm pretty sure it was her standing on the corner in her black track suit. i've told my brother to keep his eyes open for any celebrities, and the second he sees lohan, i'll let you know. i'm looking at you, sam.